We can't change anybody but ourselves. We hear this all the time, but what does it really mean? For me it means that we need to stop trying to change everyone around us, we need to stop trying to get everyone to agree with our point of view or even understand our point of view and we need to stop looking outside of ourselves to find answers for our own questions. It's accepting that everyone has their own point of view and their own truth within themselves and no matter what we do, we can not change what they see, understand or know. It' realizing that we are only responsible for ourselves and that no one outside of us is creating what we see around us.
No one outside of us has all of the answers for us, our answers lie within us. It seems if we continue to seek outside of ourselves to discover the answer to all of our questions or the solution to all of our problems we usually only find more questions and more problems. There is nothing outside of us creating anything for us, so it seems to make sense that we should look within ourselves to find the answers and solutions for our questions and problems.
I found all of this really frustrating and hard to believe, but once I began to take the time to look within myself and then trust what I found, I began to see changes in my life, some of them tiny and gradual, some of the life changing and almost over night.
Like everything important, learning to look within ourselves and trust ourselves takes practice. First we have to learn how to quiet ourselves, to look past the voices of our ego and those around us who have told us who we are and what we should be. There are many different methods for quieting ourselves, we can use yoga, meditation, breathing exercises, our process can be as simple as using focusing techniques such as focusing on the flame of a candle for a set period of time or shutting the rest of the world out while listening to relaxing music or as elaborate as lighting candles, putting on music and following a guided meditation, there is no set right or wrong way to do this. The most important part of the process is taking the time to stop and look inside ourselves with the intention of going to the very center of our being and connecting with the very center of our heart, the love center where our true self lives.
We have to go into ourselves with the understanding that within each of us is the spark of divinity, underneath all of our layers of pain and confusion and ugliness is love and light, it's in there just waiting for us to see it. We can quiet the voices of our mind and focus on the understanding that we are loved, we are full of love and we are capable of sending love out to others. Once we understand this and can connect with this, we will begin to trust ourselves and will be able to speak from our heart. When we speak from the deep center of our heart it is easier to relax and know that our words are coming from the truth within us. All of us have love and truth within us, there are no exceptions, we just don't all look and trust what we see or follow what we know. We have free will and we can choose to follow our heart center or not.
Others outside of us are like a mirror showing us either a reflection of how we would like to be or how we would rather not be, but we must look within ourselves to find who we really are and then choose what we want to present to the world. WE have the choice to be who we want to be, no one around us or outside of us can make that choice for us or is responsible for who we are or the words and actions we present to the world. Our choices create who we are, we can see ourselves as ugly and unlovable, miserable and pityful, beautiful and full of love or joyous and peaceful, it's up to us.
We have to be very careful about what energy we allow within ourselves and what energy we put out into the world because whatever we think, feel or do will be reflected in our world around us, whatever we put out there is what comes back to us. If we put our anger and hate, or world will be full of anger and hate, if we are judgmental and unloving, our world will feel condemning and loveless, if we begin to put out positive energy our world will begin to take on a positive form. We have to decide if we want to focus on the positive or the negative, if we want to put out positive or negative energy and thoughts into the world we see around us. We have to take responsibility for our own actions and thoughts and decide what we want our world around us to look like and then focus on the most positive vision of our self and our world as we can.
There will be difficulties in our world and we will come across many people who seem very difficult and unable to look within themselves and take responsibility for their own situations and their own actions, but if we can center ourselves and focus within, we will know how to handle these situations and we will not get sucked into their drama. We will learn to have empathy for people and understand their struggles without being sucked into feeling pity for them or being dragged down to their level of negativity. We will learn to be supportive of them without agreeing with everything they say or do and we will be able to speak to them from our hearts understanding they have the choice to hear what we say and accept it or not. We will be able to let go of the idea of changing anyone else or teaching them to understand what we understand or to make better choices and we will merely offer our support with the understanding that they are on their own journey and we can't do their work for them, it is up to them to do their work for themselves. We will learn to focus on our self and what we want our world to look like and be able to take responsibility for what we are putting out into our world.
If we want to change our world we have to start with ourselves and stop worrying about everyone else. It's as simple as that.
No comments:
Post a Comment